Sunday, August 21, 2011

How I got here and what I need to change.

So I guess I will start by explaining what I am doing, how I got here and why/what I need to change.

I am a fat man, have been a fat man for many years and believe it or not have spent the last several years pretty comfortable being a fat man. I have a perfect wife, 6 great kids and a pretty good life overall. As you can see by the post date its Sunday the 21st of August 2012 and I am currently weighing in at 310 pounds.

I know for a large percentage of the world that number is something to gasp at but for me its okay. You see several years ago I weighed in over 400 pounds and was miserable in ways you will never understand unless you find yourself in the morbidly obese category. I had a good run and lost over 100 pounds and life was great. I had a successful business kids a wife and now I felt better than I had in years. My weight loss plateaued,  my company went under in a horrific fashion after 11 years and the last few months I have found myself someplace new- completely depressed.

A side effect of depression for some is a loss of desire for food. I have experienced this but find myself powering through it and eating too much anyway. What I have discovered is that I have programmed myself to overeat in a very deep and effective way. I am not sure why I have done this and I know its been a journey of many little steps to make it happen but I have done it and here I am.

I often eat until I feel sick, I eat when I am not hungry, I eat when I am happy, I eat when I am sad. Whatever is going on in life I find a way to tie it back to food. Why is this???

I think a lot of people look forward to a good meal, but do they obsess about it the way I did in the past. And why now when I don't have the desire to eat do I find myself bending to those old habits and not only eating but eating more than I should and things I shouldn't be eating??

I am 36 years old and have Diabetes, High Blood Pressure and tons of little things caused by bad food decisions. This is crazy, what will it take to learn to be healthy???

I have so many questions I don't know how to answer about myself, my habits and the slow death by food I have been putting myself through. I am at a point in my life where I have some time to make personal changes and put the effort I put into my professional life into my personal one.

I am going to learn about my food addiction and figure out how to beat it.

This blog is a place for me to vent, to share my discoveries and more than anything to hold myself accountable for the decisions I am making on a daily basis.

My plan is simple, I am going to follow the reboot protocol on www.jointhereboot.com

It makes sense to me and I need to start treating food like fuel rather than an emotional crutch. First round is 15 days on fruits and vegetables exclusively.

My starting weight is 310 as I mentioned above.

Note- This is for my wife, my kids and myself. I owe it to all of us to conquer this part of me so I can be there for you.

I love you all,

Dad







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